Posts Tagged ‘Squally’


SnowqueenIcedragon’s stans made her this tribute website for MotU’s 1 year anniversary.

Master of the Universe has become the biggest thing the fandom has seen in terms of reviews, fan reaction and outside interest. In some cases this story has been life changing for the readers. It has definitely been life changing for it’s author. Who knew that this little fanfiction story would be MORE.

Idek. We’ll let the twankas handle that one.

Now SebastienRobichaud’s stans are doing something similar. From an email sent to every member of his FGB team:

Good day to you all.
You may be wondering why you’re receiving this email.
Well, SR is currently writing the FGB outtakes you have been waiting for. So I wanted to let you all know that they are not far away. Please keep an eye on your spam folders for the next little while.
The other reason you are receiving this is because fans of SR have decided to put together a tribute site for him for the completion of “The University of Edward Masen”. Our dear author has had a lot of life changing moments while he has been writing this story and many of us are thankful for being able to read it.
If you wish to let him know what this story has meant to you then you can do so by clicking this link and writing him a message.
Only Sebastien Robichaud, myself and my techie Hoot will ever see what is written. This will be turned into a private letter and sent to SR.
You are under no obligation to do this but we wanted to give you this opportunity.
With sincere gratitude,

Squally & Hoot x

Okay, we’re bored with the Icy/SR reader twank now. They’ll never be not-twanky. Unless something is particularly appalling, we’ll no longer be twanking the MotU/UoEM stans with new posts. We’ll just ETA this one. You probably won’t see anything more on the authors either, until they decide to publish.

Lets move it along.

ETA1: MotU stans roleplay the fic into a “show.”

From this amazingly scary website:

ANNOUNCEMENT

Due to recent circumstances, chat will NO LONGER be held in Edward’s apartment. Instead, we shall be meeting in the downstairs cigar room of Escala. When entering the building, turn right off the main lobby to find the cigar room. Thank you for your cooperation.

THE SHOW STARTED MONDAY AUGUST 9 @ 8 PM FORKS

PLEASE FOLLOW ALL CHARACTERS to Follow along.

With Permission from Icy herself we are acting out SnowQueens IceDragon’s Master Of the Universe here and out on twitter

Follow us @FiftyShadesEd and @Ms_IsabellaSwan.

We Started at chapter one and will continue to move thru to the end 87 89 endless chapters and the 50 Shades of Mr Edward Cullen. Please join us on this journey of making Mr Cullen and Ms Swan a reality. Spread the word and join the site for chats and discussions about MotU as well as interact with Mr Cullen and Isabella and the rest of the cast.

This site is for 18 and over only due to extreme language and explicit sex and because Edward Cullen is 50 Shades of Fucked up.

We run the story one chapter at a time for 1-1.5 hours each night
Starting at 8pm Seattle time.

They even got a fucking twibbon for this crap. That thing people on Twitter do to support a cause, like breast cancer, or feeding the hungry, or stopping hate and bigotry. They have a twibbon for the “Bunker Babes” too.

We can’t.

Then, the application to “become” a character includes questions like:

Do you understand we will be acting out line by line the Queen’s story first in MSN and then moving it to twitter?

And

Mr Cullen’s NDA states nothing that happens in MSN can be discussed outside of our Behind the Scenes Conversations. Also that you fully understand and agree to all the terms listed on this app? If you are found to be in violation of the NDA depending on the severity of the offence you may have your role taken from you. Do you Agree if you become an Official MotU character you will abide by the NDA?

ETA2: Love comes in spurts (little spurts):

Tribute to “Master Of The Universe (by Snowqueens Icedragon)”
Song written and performed by Betti Gefecht
Mp3 download at http://bettis-art-house.blogspot.com

Lyrics:

Quick to be angered
Hard to please
Hot and cold and bittersweet
Everything about him
Makes me weak in the knees
And yet I’m still on my feet
Cuz when he shifts his way
From bright to moody
It’s just one of the fifty shades
Of his Beauty

Some call him master
Some call him a mess
Sometimes it hurts
Sometimes I want it faster
Sometimes I want less
Love comes in spurts (little spurts)
Because the gift he
Makes me
Is a treasure
He gives me fifty shades
Of pleasure

Doubt swiftly fades
Here’s my confession:
(Goddess to god, inner goddess calling)
I crave his fifty shades
Of love and passion

Fifty shades of love…

.


Twank happens in the UoEM thread, Nonnies flood our inbox, we sift through it to find the lulz.

The general tl;dr gist of this is:

  • SR makes a few brief posts (he’s been MIA for a long while) that have something to do with spreading goodness and charity. Got a lot of people to volunteer to do all the work. Denounced all the negativity rippling through fandom. Suggests he not be terribly closely tied to the fundraiser, as blind hatred for his name alone will sully it. Made no mention of UoEM specifically.
  • Maybebymonday decides, since SR is around, it might be a good time to finally get an answer as to why he pulled the story.
  • Isabeausink replies begging The Muses to ignore MBM, laces her post with the most pretentious/condescending vernacular to ever grace Twilighted.
  • After the thread diligently ignores MBM for a dozen or more posts, MBM replies to Isa that she only needs SR to reply, anyway.
  • Mostly A Lurker replies to MBM, explaining that it is an open forum, so she is inviting response from anyone except when the thread is told to ignore her. Maybe she should visit SR’s official website?
  • MBM replies stating that she is only interested in a response from SR, but given the mystery surrounding the story’s disappearance, it seems valid to post it in a public forum where others might also have questions.
  • Zoe123 pops in with a big GUUURRLLLL OH NO YOU DI-IN’T since MBM referred to SR as a “she.”  Also this overdramatic nonsense: “who are you to ask with such a sinister attitude against him and all of us
  • Chriserlyn makes a post suggesting that there is a conspiracy! MBM is trying to provoke The Muses so as to gain merit to report false accusations to the mods.
  • boricua_smv: “Wise words, my dear Gardenia. Sloretinis anyone?
  • More general agreement
  • MBM is all “WTF?”
  • HNWhitlock200 makes EMPHATIC ALL CAPS REPLY IN TEAL: “SON OF A FUCKING BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” MBM has clearly ruined her entire day.
  • Morgan Locklear: “First, let’s not pretend that MBM ‘s question isn’t valid. But her problem is that she’s rude, plain and simple, she’s been chasing budding posters off this thread for ages, (even a mostly blind lurker can see that.)How insulting to think that SR wouldn’t answer all our questions when he can.” Only he hasn’t. “Madam, you are surprisingly aggressive for someone who is attached to a non bullying campaign starting today.” She then tells MBM how to properly make an inquiry to our dear, fragile SR.
  • General agreement with Morgan in the form of “POSITIVITY ONLY DAY!” and “YOU HAVE BALLS, LIKE SR!” and “YOU WERE SO MUCH NICER THAN I WOULD HAVE BEEN!”
  • *MOB MENTALITY* *MOB MENTALITY* *MOB MENTALITY*
  • MBM is all “Oh, so this is why no one likes you people.”
  • WritingBabe makes a particularly lulzy teal deer post in which she recounts a story of being bullied as a child and likens MBM’s antics to that of her oldendays aggressors. “MBM, you may feel a victim, but you’re behaving like an aggressor. and your persistence leads me to tell you that you are on a destructive path. Destructive to others, but also destructive to yourself. Even if you relish the idea of hurting people you believe have somehow wronged you, you are setting patterns of behavior that will never help you thrive.
  • *SYMPATHY* *SYMPATHY* *SYMPATHY* WE WERE BULLIED, TOO!
  • Morgan Locklear: “If you would like to avoid further embarrassment at having your flimsy posts dismantled you may address me privately. But since it is the attention you seek, I won’t hold my breath.
  • MariaVisconti: “SR, thank you for your leadership. You’ve set a precedent on how to address negativity and hatred…. Do something Good! We may not be able to control all the evil in the world but we can , by helping others, stop our hearts from becoming hard, closed off, bitter, and most terrifying….faithless.
  • Twankhard reminds you that SR has made no appearance since MBM’s post.
  • Strange thread-wide “Book Club Meeting” in which they compare UoEM to the classic Jane Eyre.
  • Charlotte Bronte rolls over in her grave.
  • Morgan Locklear: “Jane Eyre, chapter 4, “November, December, and half of January passed away.” Anyone else think of New Moon?
  • Charlotte Bronte rolls over in her grave again.
  • Monamour finally clears up the charity thing: “SR and others are putting together an outtake book raising money for charity in Trayce’s honor as a show of the goodness in the fandom.
  • Twilighted Mod finally comes on to remind them that SR rules even Twilighted with his ginormous group of followers who give them traffic to be nice.

We’d like to point out that we’ve seen far worse mob mentality on Twilighted. On this specific thread even. As notorious as the mob mentality is around there, and since MBM has experienced it first hand herself, we can’t really argue that she didn’t make the post expecting a reaction and hoping it’d be worse.

But it is lulzy, if not for the Jane Eyre comparisons alone.

All the posts are hidden from font page. Click to read them in all their teal deer glory.

.

(more…)


By popular demand in Johnny’s thread (*irony*), we present to you…

The Fic Bridge: Big Name Author Love

Today, we are being positive about Big Name Authors. Why? Because chances are they have felt the heat of hate. They are easy targets and usually are tough to get a rise out of.

Instead of reacting, more often than not, a BNA will power through and keep writing for the readers that are enjoying their stories. Chances are, they jump at the opportunity to participate in charities and pimp other author’s stories.

When I was starting out, I had friendly, sweet help from quite a few well known authors. They answered questions, gave me the time of day, and continued to talk to me even though I am such a disgusting thing on Twitter.

They have set precedents for up and coming authors.

So today, big name authors get a little love.

We were going to make a day where we could just appreciate all authors equally, but the BNAs with 30,000 reviews just don’t get enough support! SR and SnowqueenSomething don’t have even have BIG NAME READERS to write creepy RPFs about them and their genitalia versions of Edward. Hurry! Let’s make them feel fellated and appreciated!

squalloogal wrote: I have turned off PM’s for the time being.

To those who had sent messages – Please wait on word from SR. I don’t know anything helpful to you. If you have copies of UoEM I don’t want them. I don’t want to know and I wish to remind everyone that “University of Edward Masen” is owned and written by the author going by the penname Sebastien Robichaud.

DO NOT DISTRIBUTE COPIES – this is theft.

DO NOT TELL ME ABOUT IT – I will just swear and call you a FUCKER.

That is all.

***********

Urgh I hate these kinds of posts.

So to cleans the palet…

Something lazy with hopefully some laughs and Something to SAY.

*********

A/N
I do not own Twilight; The University of Edward Masen; Master of the Universe or any other fanfiction stories or characters you may find within.
I am however blessed to call these Authors Friends. So I am not fazed.
Special thanks go to my beloved Beta Jenn who helped make this garbage readable.
This is the tale of a love story across the forums and through the pages of Twilight fanfiction
Above is just a sampling of the love we have shared with our lead characters Snowqueens Icedragon (Icy) and Sebastien Robichaud (SR)
I mean no disrespect. This is an act of love and the usual Squally fuckery.
In Lieu of an awe inspiring update of UoEM and MotU we have in its stead…. this.
Enjoy!

::SRICY a Love Story

Back in the age when fanfic was king there lived a mousy man named Sebastien. He was friends with a dragon called Falcor and a mean but sexy bloke called Sinward.

Sinward was of the tribe of WARDS, of which there were many. All the Wards were hunky, but some of them could kick your ass. Even though Sinward was a fierce guy he was very loyal and a great friend and ally of Sebastien’s.

Sebastien haled from the small village of Uni. Its nearest neighbor was a strange and mysterious place called Bunker. Sebastien heard tales of a beautiful and sassy maiden living in the land of Bunker and chose one day to visit.

As he entered into its royal courts he met a strange and exotic fellow by the name of Fifty. Sebastien thought it such a strange name for a fellow to bear, but said nothing of it. Fifty kind of gave him the creeps.

“What are you doing here? What do you want?” Fifty glared at young Sebastien and made him stutter.

“Um..I um, I’m loo look looking for the beautiful maiden of Bunker.”

“You can’t have her. Be gone you craven little man,” Fifty bellowed. “Even if you could find her, she’d have nothing to do with you. Look at you. ” Fifty stared at Sebastien and as he did he began to chuckle.

“Actually do you know what? I WILL tell you where to find our beauty Icy. She can be found in the midst of Bunker near the fountain of OB.” Fifty laughed harder believing Sebastien to be no threat to his manhood and let him on his way.

Our poor hero was so shaken by his encounter with the domineering Fifty that he looked behind him and pondered on whether he should go back to whence he had come. He was such a brave little Uniman though that with a deep breath he took hold of himself and marched into Bunker with focus.

In the belly of Bunker there could be heard such merriment. Many brazen and barely clothed women were drinking and talking about all manner of unmentionable things. Sebastien looked on in shock.

Who are these women? he thought to himself wondering how such creatures were allowed to mingle in polite society. Yet there in the midst he noticed a flash of long brown locks and the glimpse of a svelte figure.

That was her – he knew it. The beauty. The beauty of Bunker.

Never had he felt so thrilled and so terrified as he did in that moment. Icy, the beauty, turned around in the gaggle of woman and faced in his direction. She was heart stoppingly attractive. All Sebastien’s senses left him and he found his feet leading him closer to her.

When he was but a hares breath away from her he opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. She had stolen his very breath with her enchanting whiles. The words of Fifty began to play over in his head. He heard again the laughter of the domineering man echoing through his soul.

Sebastien feeling defeat without saying a single word dropped his head and began to move away. How could a man like him be enough for such a goddess as Icy?

Just as he began to turn to leave her presence he felt her hand gently and tenderly take his. Sebastien looked up into the deep pools of chocolate that seemed to be reaching his very soul.

Icy smiled. “Hello,” she said quietly.

“Hello.” Sebastien being a man of great breeding never forgot his manners, regardless of the situation and circumstance, and began to introduce himself.

“I am Sebastien Robichaud of the land of Uni. You must be Icy of Bunker.”

“What makes you say so?” Icy looked upon him in kindness

“Well, you are the most beautiful lady I have ever set eyes upon” Sebastien blushed at his own bluntness. His face looked like an overcooked lobster. That blood red blush only made Icy’s smile grow. She had never encountered a soul, male or female, that had such little guile. Her heart began to soften greatly towards him.

All at once the gaggling girls surrounding them began to scream and swoon. Both Icy and Sebastien looked around. They had been lost in their not so private moment and were now aware that all the women seemed to be about to pass out. Sebastien looked for the cause of the ruckus when he noticed Fifty approaching him at great speed.

“Step away from her worm. She is mine.”

Icy’s nostrils flared. “I belong to no-one Fifty. How many times must I explain this to you? Just because I spend my weeks with your words and endless stories in my head does NOT make me yours.”

Fifty huffed.

Unbeknownst to Sebastien his good friend Sinward had been worried about his little chum Sebastien and followed him into the land of Bunker, if at a distance. As he came upon the scene in front of him he growled in righteous indignation. How dare this ‘Fifty’ speak to his friend that way.

That was it. He was taking up arms and going to battle. He charged into the throng of gaggling women who, by the way, were fainting and creaming themselves at his very presence and shoved Fifty.

“Back off you overgrown whipping boy,” Sinward huffed.

Fifty was having none of that and began throwing sex toys at Sinward. It was turning into an all out brawl on a scale no fairytale has ever been witness to.

Butt plugs and ben wah balls covered the ground. Sinward had a lovely bullet shaped mark on his forehead that was turning purple at speed while he was trying to strangle Fifty with his bow tie.

Bored of the commotion around them, and while all the woman had taken up various locations and positions sprawled out pleasuring themselves watching the events take place, both Sebastien and Icy snuck away to a quiet place.

They fell in love over time and settled down in the land of Gchat where they whiled away their days playing in Sebastien’s PJ collection and Icy’s bottom drawer.

The land of Fanfinction would always rejoice to have been witness to such awesome fuckery and such passionate love.

THE END {or is it?

This doesn’t have 5 more chapters and videos to go with it. How will all these BNAs know you love them, unless you profess it? Frequently?

What’s this?

You only have 200 reviews?

No one gives a shit about you.

Now, go find someone who’s actually important and tell them how they are LYKE OMG SO AWESUM!

.


I think SR pulled a major twank by pulling the fic down between the final chapter and the epi. SR did it with NO explanation or even acknowledgment on the ffn profile or epi a/n, an acknowledgment but no explanation given at all as to why it was pulled down (minus a reference to disappointment about the bit torrent the week before) in the twilighted thread

Well if we can twank Olivia for it, then why not our good man-pal SR? At least Olivia fessed up and aired out her publishing-fantasies. SR would rather beat around that particular bush (you’re about as transparent as saran wrap, man) with a quite convenient (alleged) plagiary tantrum.

His Fanfiction.net profile reads like your usual spiel of self-importance:

No translations of UOEM have been authorized. No downloading, copying, reposting or distribution of this story have been authorized, either, regardless of the source.

As do his Author Notes:

Disclaimer: The characters of Twilight are owned by Stephenie Meyer. The original content, ideas and intellectual property of this story are owned by Sebastien Robichaud and copyrighted, as of 2009. Plagiarism is theft and is treated as such in many different countries. Translations of UOEM have not been authorized, nor has any downloading, copying, reposting on other websites or distribution of this story, regardless of the source.

And it wouldn’t be complete without his very own domain name, http://www.sebastienrobichaud.com/, and blog to further reach his masses. All of this screams “E-G-O” to us, but does it really come as a big surprise? Especially with such recent forum comments as these:

Laughs…while I have heard from him with reviews and Pm’s the only post he responded to from me here was recently when I posted my Twilight band-aids so it wasn’t actually to me…oh he did wish me a happy birthday in an AN and called me a “cherished reader” which made me melt, and I like how he calls us “miss”, muses, ladies and today Lovelies!

And don’t forget (as if she’d let you) that he has the fandom’s first and only Big Named Reader (yes, BNR, it exists now) on his team. Of course, you haven’t made it big in this fandom until squalloogal mortifies you showers you with redundantly fannish and blind praise. Every big author needs a sycophant cheerleader to build them mega-FGB teams and turn something like a humble charity into a laughable competition of Twilight fanfiction author egos. She’s flounced deleted that Twitter, so while we can’t provide the hilarity of screenshots for that particular twank, we’ll just leave you with this: the weird emotional devastation she displayed when being cyber-bullied during FGB on that same twitter account earlier this year:

I use to be a tough girl who could handle anything. Really sassy and brassy. After I was attacked that girl died. I no longer have the coping mechanisms to deal with this constant assault. I am sorry.

For those who have judged me.

I forgave those that changed my life that night. I live with those scars physically and emotionally everyday but I wish them NO ill will. I forgave them.

For those doing what your doing. I forgive you too but I just can’t cope.

We love a good, dramatic overreaction. Nonnie from earlier today said it best:

We can follow that up with the dramatic entrances and exits from Twi-World. She’s had more comings and goings than Paris and Lindsay combined.
The drama of ‘blocking’ and ‘unblocking’ twitter users, the big epic posts on the UoEM/MoTU forum about why she is leaving, the big epic posts from her supporters about why this is a disaster, the supporting posts from the writers about how terrible it is to lose someone like Squally.
Squally leaving the fandom for a few weeks is guaranteed to result in a few hundred posts on a Twilighted forum. It’s all about the drama.

But… moving on…

So while there are emotionally-unstable-fangirls aplenty just waiting for the moment to strike their mighty insanity down upon any who would cause their beloved Edward SR harm, we had to wonder. Is this guy for real? Not in a does he really have bits dangling between his legs kind of way, because we could really care less what his gender is. But really. Is he for real?

Did he really pull UoEM because of this whole bit torrent fiasco? Or is he just jerking his faithful readers along until it’s announced that he wants their money support in an upcoming publishing endeavor?

Since this can neither be confirmed or denied, we figured we’d just wait it out until something juicy and incriminating came along.

Enter, Nonnie.

Why do we love Nonnies? Because they can singlehandedly sift through the shit heap known as The University of Edward Masen by SebastienRobichaud’s Twilighted thread and come out with the best quotes. We’d do it ourselves, but we’re just too fond of our brain cells and individualism to plunder through 5,038 pages of blind admiration and borderline disturbing flirtation.

Posted by SebastienRobichaud on Mon Nov 16, 2009 7:03 pm

I’m afriad it’s inevitable. There’s almost no way to control who uploads the story and disseminates it, not to mention who translates it.
The only way to truly address the issue is to sue the bastards who steal the work.

Unfortunately, it’s the best and most popular stories that are stolen.
But no, I’m not about to pull the story. I know this is not a novel that could be published in its own right anyway; it’s given me the confidence to think I could write a novel and send it to a literary agent. So for me, plagiarized or not, it’s already served its purpose.
But that’s too bad about the stories that were pulled already.

SR

Posted by SebastienRobichaud on Sat Nov 07, 2009 12:06 am

…there will be no LOMAH.
Barring an unforeseen disaster or (God forbid) my untimely demise, I will finish the story and post it. Period.
Plagiarism won’t scare me off; I have friends who are Sicilian.

Posted by SebastienRobichaud on Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:09 pm

Hello Stephk,
You’re welcome.
Once I started the story, there was no way I was going to pull it.
I think that would be unethical.

Posted by SebastienRobichaud on Mon Oct 26, 2009 4:40 pm

Yes, I promise all of the answers will be answered.
Even if I need an epilogue and an appendix numerically listed in order to do so.
And as I said earlier to someone, I’m not pulling the story.
Never.
I knew when I began it that in so doing I was obligated 1) to finish it in a timely manner and 2) never to pull it even if it is stolen/plagiarized
no ITLOMAH for me or my readers.
SR

Hypocrisy tag says: “Too easy.”

So now we get SR’s game. It’s all very obvious to us. It’s unethical and wrong to pull a story for something as silly as plagiarism, unless it gets really illogically popular (and some crooked archive offers to give you money for the rights to the PDF).

Quick! How many languages can we say “sell out” in?

I also wonder if this snippet from his profile will grace the jacket PDF notes:

Throughout the course of the story classical literature, music and art from Western culture will be referenced. No prior knowledge of any of these elements is required. But if one desires to travel more deeply into the heart of the labyrinth, these sources will provide clues to the successive mysteries contained in the story.

We hate to spoil it for you, but…

EDWARD’S EVEN MORE MISOGYNISTIC WITHOUT THE COOL TWILIGHT NAME ATTACHED TO GIVE US REFLECTIVE CONTEXT.

Just saying.

ETA: Some lulzy review twank

From FanFiction.net reviewer dottiez123
2010-07-19 on chapter 40 of The University of Edward Masen

I love being the basis for a character (“Amanda L’Union”).

But you do have a few inconsistencies with the characterization:

1) I’m a literature professor at a major US university;

2) many of your readers attend (or have attended) community colleges, so it’s rather impressive that you’re INSULTING YOUR READERS BY INSINUATING THEIR EDUCATIONAL ROUTES ARE SOMEHOW SUBSTANDARD TO YOUR OWN;

3) if you had any knowledge of community colleges, you would know that they’re often alternatives for high-achieving students who don’t have adequate funds to attend a college or university;

4) most community colleges are staffed solely by PhDs (something you lack); and

5) most community colleges pay better than many private colleges and universities (I know this as the daughter of a retired community college professor).

It’s clear that I intimidate you tremendously, as evidenced by basing a character off of me and using the EXACT words I used in an earlier review, just to cite two examples.

Your story is utter nonsense, and your writing is stilted indulgent. And shame on you for blocking reviews from my original account. It’s clear you cannot take criticism. DO YOU BLOCK ALL REVIEWERS WHO SAY SOMETHING NOT TO YOUR LIKING? Tsk, tsk.’

From Twilighted forum post:

Re: The University of Edward Masen by SebastienRobichaud
by Sebastien Robichaud on Sun Jul 11, 2010 10:41 pm
Forum: Alternate Universe – Human
Topic: The University of Edward Masen by SebastienRobichaud Replies: 50399 Views: 475933

Dear Everyone,

Thanks for reading and posting your theories. I’m going to try to post a teaser early Tuesday …

Those of you who were in on the whole beret episode will be surprised to learn that the reader who trashed my beret as effete pretension is still reading UOEM …. 5 chapters later.

In fact, in reviewing this chapter, she huffed that I should at least ask her permission before quoting one of her reviews.

Sorry if this seems small of me, but her review (and the fact that after pronouncing UOEM as rubbish she is STILL reading it) made me laugh.

So of course, I had to share the humour with you all. And post a few smileys … :lol: :geek:

We’re glad to see SR has such an amazing sense of humor, because creating villains as a form of fan-fic revenge against reviewers is pretty high up there in OMG WTF GET OVER YOURSELF.

.